Dedicate New Song Lyrics To Jewell – Mad Chaos: April 1, 1998

It’s the official first day of the month, since I stuffed up the last entry and thought it was today.  Since I’ve already talked of the philosophy for this month at the end of last month (for this month), I thought I might skip it. 

Write A New Song For Dedications CD

Something great has just happened while I’ve been working on the computer though.  With some inspiration gained from a CD that I’ve borrowed from Dina I have been able to write another song (even though it will be hard to remember all the beats and lyrics in my mind for the first eleven songs).  The song was obtained by also being inspired by the last few days Jewell and I were together.

Since it is almost Jewell’s 17^th birthday I thought I would look back upon the year and see those last days before we broke up.  That prompted some phrases that I could use for a song.  With ideas in my head and music playing on the CD player, I didn’t hesitate to start typing out my ideas. 

I’ve had ideas already in my head running wild for other lyrics and types of songs, but I couldn’t contain them anymore.  Inspiration has led to success.  Soon I will print my new song rough prints on my first day of April.

How I came up with the lyrics is purely from my head, as I looked back at my Diary entries and my thoughts and feelings of the final days.  Then, once again in my own words I wrote them down in the computer and then arranged moods in chronological order, added a chorus and some other fancy things, and there I am, a song. 

The song resembles styles from the CD I lent off Dina today which was “KCi and Jo Jo”.  While this song was coursing through my head, my thoughts were it could be the song for the 22^nd March 1997 (the day things started to go downhill, the night of the party and the day of the park we visited the City).  Here is the song in full…

Tonight As We Sat Down

(VERSE)

Early this morning, we planned our date in the park,

Sitting in the shade of a tree, we started talking bout me,

And how your favorite color is green, as I lent over and kissed your lips,

And I think that it’s time, that I wrote you a letter,

To express all of my feelings within, and I started thinking,

That I’ll give it to you at the party, as I fold the letter three times and then…

(CHORUS)

Last night as we sat down, and drank wine at the party,

You kept your distance from me,

And ever since I’ve written you this letter,

You’ve pretended that it didn’t exist,

And I thought that every time you glanced my way,

You would smile at me and then blow a kiss,

But how I was wrong, I don’t want to lose your love,

Why did you do it to me baby, why did you take your love away,

(VERSE)

I called your house last night, you were out for a long walk,

You were out until the sun did rise, and in my eyes,

You kept your feelings hidden inside, but I knew what you wanted to say,

Today I woke up, an hour late,

And lay in my bed, and stared, as I glanced up at the sky,

And I knew deep inside of me, I knew that something was wrong,

(CHORUS)

Last night as we sat down, and drank wine at the party,

You kept your distance from me,

And ever since I’ve written you this letter,

You’ve pretended that it didn’t exist,

And I thought that every time you glanced my way,

You would smile at me and then blow a kiss,

But how I was wrong, I don’t want to lose your love,

Why did you do it to me baby, why did you take your love away,

 (BRIDGE)

All day I was thinking bout you, about what could have gone wrong,

Thinking to myself and I know,

You didn’t mean to do all this wrong,

But I don’t want to say goodbye, and I don’t understand why,

(CHORUS)

Last night as we sat down, and drank wine at the party,

You kept your distance from me,

And ever since I’ve written you this letter,

You’ve pretended that it didn’t exist,

And I thought that every time you glanced my way,

You would smile at me and then blow a kiss,

But how I was wrong, I don’t want to lose your love,

Why did you do it to me baby, why did you take your love away,

(VERSE)

I write a song, you paint a pretty picture,

But intertwined, and in the corner of my mind,

That’s our whole life, and it feels like blue rain,

 so blue the rain but I can’t imagine why,

(CHORUS AND FADE AWAY)

Last night as we sat down, and drank wine at the party,

You kept your distance from me,

And ever since I’ve written you this letter,

You’ve pretended that it didn’t exist,

And I thought that every time you glanced my way,

You would smile at me and then blow a kiss,

But how I was wrong, I don’t want to lose your love,

Why did you do it to me baby, why did you take your love away,

There you have it, that’s my story, that’s my new song.  With all the others, I will print it out and leave it to gather dust, one day, in hopes of publishing it.

Mail Jewell’s Birthday Letter

Now for the day just passed…  This morning I woke up with Lyssa.  Even though she was moody in the morning and she didn’t want to go to work, it was sorted out.  After sending her off on the bus I walked back home, wrote in my Diary and got dressed for Campbelltown. 

With Jewell’s letter in hand I visited the Post Office after a brisk walk and posted Jewell’s letter, plus the application letter (which I had printed out prior to this).  Sending them both off I then moved towards the CES where I looked for a position, but to no avail.

Blowing Kuper’s Sound System

Catching a train to Leumeah I carried Lyssa’s bag of makeup and books to her house, where I rested and read the weekend paper.  Calling Imad on the phone, I asked him to come over and drop off the CD so I could listen to it.  Half an hour later he came over, but was in a big hurry to get to a meeting at work.

Back in Lyssa’s house I put the CD on Kuper’s system and cranked it up.  I took out the words and sung along from the kitchen to watch if anyone was coming home.  Unluckily for me, the system blew somehow.  The speakers must have crossed circuitry.  Whatever happened I haven’t owned up to it yet.  I wonder how long it will be until he finds out.

Pick Lyssa Up From Train Station

Walking to Leumeah Station I picked Lyssa up, as it was a hot day.  We walked back to her house.  She told me how she met a 16-year-old friend today who was a girl with blonde hair and green eyes and was fairly pretty.  Lyssa said that you could tell the girl was 16 and immature, as she could only talk about little petty things and then laugh at them.

Lyssa made me something to eat.  Then after watching television and talking for some time I had to leave.  Lyssa was upset, but as I gave her a kiss and waved goodbye from the front porch we both quickly ran to the back porch.  Lyssa then continued to wave with the cat in her hand until I was out of sight.  I was supposed to call my dad with some money that Lyssa gave me but the phone box ate my money.  I left walking for home angry.

Lyssa and I have planned to visit the Easter Show at Homebush next weekend.  With the pay I will be getting, we will both be spending for show bags and entry.  This is the first real place we would have been to together and I’m looking forward to it.

Back at home I had something to eat, played on my computer and then called Lyssa.  We talked on the phone for about half an hour.  Then when it was time to tape Melrose Place for Lyssa she had to go to sleep, so I let her go. 

Preparing The Dedications CD

In all that time until now I have been playing on the computer and writing the lyrics for my new song.  Right now I’m listening to all the songs that I am arranging on the CD I will be printing, maybe in a couple of month’s time.  No rush.

I’ve figured that because I’m sleepy and I want to get to sleep I’m writing my entry pretty fast.  I’ve also noticed that I haven’t made many mistakes in this entry, meaning I must be more open-eyed for some reason. 

Tomorrow I am supposed to attend an interview at 10:30am, but right now I don’t think I will be able to attend.  I will set my alarm but I don’t think I will be bothered to get up in the morning.