The Pressure To Move House – Mad Chaos: October 9, 2004

Immense stressors like a possible move, multiple distractions, neighborhood noises and physical pain incapacitated me with mental torpor ever since I woke up.  The traumas combined sapped all pleasure, caused malaise, weak, sore muscles made me bedridden and gastrointestinal cramps so pronounced have afflicted me for hours. 

I am a mess exacerbated by anxious considerations for the memoir.  A small window of conation now presents itself, to illustrate personal inadequacies, but an important accomplishment for the Federal Election.

Heightened Family Tensions

Sleep at 3:30am followed four sound, literal hours, but what followed was mysterious dysfunction in this house.  I know families have issues.  Perhaps the episode on the seventeenth may have sparked this unstable period.  Nonetheless, in an uncharacteristic pattern, my brother has shown since I self isolated, he rumbled downstairs at 4am, and in its unusual hour, exited the house and slammed the door behind him.

I was a mouse on the computer, so his reason to leave was on a coincidental hour.  Perhaps there are other issues I am unaware of, because a minute later I heard mum storm back into her bedroom for sleep.  I assumed she had been there, so this puzzled me.  Perhaps their proximity caused her obvious problems, either because of ideas I placed in his head or because my brother confessed how he exploited mum, and her backlash combined made him feel unwanted. 

In added drama, five minutes after mum reclaimed her bedroom, I heard a door slam upstairs.  I assumed it was dad. 

All I could think was, “Man, the tensions in this house are so high.”

Domestic Tensions In The Household

At 6am after a pair of hours asleep, I was roused to hear mum and dad in the middle of a tussle, where she argued and dad sounded like he pushed her. 

A repetitive, “Shush, shush,” he sounded. 

The tension is palpable, but I have no clue how involved I am to aggravate the others.  This possible link depressed me because I had a simple purpose, and the best way for people to help is to leave me alone. 

I hope all this tension was never provoked because of a brother that took offense to feel unstable and unwanted in this house because of my position.  I know he can be childish.

When I woke up at 11:45am to urinate, I saw the bench press had been used, but the ten kilo plates I purchased were replaced by a pair of his rusted five kilo plates on each side, which implies to me subliminal disapproval.

Discuss Moving With Artie

I walked to the local primary school to vote minutes later, prepared with black three quarter pants and a brown shirt.  I had hoped to slip into the primary school, vote, and slip out, but Artie was down there, whose house almond and Min-Su used to live in. 

Artie approached me and said hello.  In our circumstantial encounter, he was a curious supplier of vital information.

Artie spoke of house plans.  The topic of a possible move of mine arose. 

“Why, who with,” Artie with his gilded pilot sunglasses asked. 

“You know Tyler,” I added, as Artie surprised me to explain the whole issue. 

“Yeah, Finn is headed down to Tasmania and Tyler needs someone to move in,” he brushed an apple. 

“How did you know that,” I exclaimed.

“Word travels,” he joked.

Then he explained in a practical manner how his friend Jaxson visited mumbles yesterday. 

“Who is he,” I wondered.

In a slapstick manner, Artie explained he was an aboriginal friend whom I knew was a year under me in school.

Casting A Vote In The Federal Election

Now the purpose of their reunion was never considered much when I spoke to Artie, as we moved up in the queue and sided each other to vote.  I voted for the Liberals while Artie nominated Labor. 

“If I move in with Tyler you should come over and have a drink,” I said. 

“Yeah, I will,” Artie sounded uncertain.  His voice hid details he was privy to.

I walked to the local shops and purchased a cheese and bacon bread as well as a donut for rewards. 

The Pressure To Move House

Upon arrival back home an empty beer bottle was noticed on the downstairs cupboard, beside my racer and around the corner from my bedroom door, which is an unusual place for a bottle to be.  I wondered whether my brother returned with alcohol, and like the bench press, he placed the subliminal reminder there as a lecture, caution, perhaps to unnerve. 

Perhaps dad drank the alcohol, but dad never drinks this fashionable brand, which leads me to believe all this behavior is concocted to distress me, or blame me for a considered snub.

I had an immense headache of problems that these discoveries further compounded to.  Perhaps my brother intends to jeopardize my moods in the memoir, and subliminal symbolism is the only albatross he can use.  When I considered mumbles and the move, the pressures worked. 

“I could have scared Tyler to look around,” I considered, where the jerk I was and my compatible nature with Claribel would have been alarm bells.  I would never mind if he invited someone else to share his abode because my impression even appalled me, but if the machine divides and conquers and mumbles falls for the betrayal, I will be one vicious fucker. 

I have faith in mumbles and remain rational.  I know he will be respectful to advise me if others influenced him, but this cocktail of stressors have a bane been to ruin all momentum.

Rumblings Within The Family

I remember my brother arrived home around 1pm in the Commodore for five minutes, which was curious. 

An hour later he returned for an extended discussion upstairs, where I muted the television and heard mum speak of money. 

“I am unable to provide,” mum apologized in a solid stance, as my brother rushed downstairs, jumped in his Commodore and disappeared. 

I assume he wanted to hoard for his laptop and used his usual lack of discretion to ask unreasonable expectations of mum.

Eric has no patience.  Ever since Sabrina was born he has been infatuated with money.  Eric should work if he wants to support his behavior, instead of depend on assistance from others.  I am humble to be poor.  I have patience and tolerate this house meanwhile. 

I can see my brother is unstable, but his selfish, neurotic fascination helps neither Sabrina nor Lottie, and it exploits the charitable. 

I would donate to my brother if he was responsible, but he has megalomaniac ambitions, which naïve people like us sponsor.

From 3pm to 4:30pm I catnapped, but our moron Palestinian neighbor blasted the subwoofers in his car.  The whole block could hear.  Brand me hypocritical because I used to be the disturbance of the peace around here, but he is such a vainglorious show pony.  I was woken up nevertheless.

Ever since then I had lunch, and slinked around in my bedroom agonized by an ache in my stomach.  I had three meals to line the stomach, but the pain wrenched inside, which could have been a physical manifestation of all the stressors.

Since 6pm I viewed the Federal Election Broadcast, where the noise in the house died down.  Eric never did return, but his mountain bike remains at the scene of the crime. 

I am proud to say that the Liberals won a landslide, and perhaps power in the senate.  Liberals I believe think of Australia on a worldwide basis, while Labor is small-minded and sectarian.  Liberal is choices, whereas Labor is choice.  Liberal provides us with tiers of services, while Labor seeks to monopolize them. 

The debate on public and private schools is one issue where I believe Liberals provide choices, while Labor seeks to scuttle those choices.  There are dozens of other policies but I am proud I helped contribute to choices to leave our nation in sound economical hands. 

So, now I am prepared to loiter in listlessness and sap further hours.