Diary Of A Mad Chaos: Monday, July 9, 2018

Work Day In CSR Martini

The time was 9:30 am when I came off my first break at work at CSR Martini.

In the morning I swept up for 1.5 hours.  Then I got put onto the last machine, rolling big rolls and then vacuum-sealing bags.  It is fortunate because I was able to crouch down and then stand up.  All that crouching means that I did not have a back problem today.

The Line Manager Show Me How It Is Done

The Fijian line boss I work for really gets on my nerves.  He is the kind of manager that only points out the negative things and shows you how to do it.  He assumes that you are going to pick up the pace and be as quick as everyone else within a matter of days.

He treats people like a cattle dog rather than human beings.

So, when I came back from the break and I was working on that machine again with that guy, one time I would fall back behind, because you would take 5 seconds to open a bag more than before, and then you would be left behind.  By the time you have done all your steps, the machine is cutting with the saw.  Then you have to fetch the next roll.

Anyway, he said, “I am only going to only show you once how to do it.  Watch me!”

I am thinking, “You are the fucking model example.”

I sat back to watch how he does it.  I picked up one or two moves.

Then, when he is finished, he said, “See.  I didn’t need any help!  I can do it by myself.”

I am thinking, “Fucking bravo.”

The Processing Line Backs Up Again

Then I kept going on.

Then the other colleague had a problem.  He picked up some new black wrap bags, but they did not have perforations in them.

He had to rush to get other bags.  You do not have enough time to do anything in between.

The Fijian line boss came back.

The gay colleague said, “It is my fault this time.”  He explained the problem.

The Fijian Line Manager Demonstrates A Second Time

Then the Fijian line manager helped us again.

He said, “Let me show you how to open a bag.  That is why you are falling behind and making mistakes.”

I am thinking, “Fuck off man.  You sound like my brother.  You are always being negative.”

Then, he looks me in the eyes, and says, “Are you tired,” as if he is looking for me to come up with an excuse.

I replied, “No.  I am not tired.  I am just going at my normal pace.”

He said, “You should pick up your pace!”

I am thinking, “Fuck man.  You are a fucking idiot.”

He is just annoying.  All he understands is how to work people like fucking dogs.  And that is why I don’t like that cunt.

Tough Times Back In Australia

Anyway, I just bide my lips.

When 12 pm came, I came for lunch.

These few weeks back in Australia have been tough.  I had almost no money for most of those few weeks.  Sometimes I am so poor that I can’t even eat.

Today, all I could buy was a 50 cent ice-cream cone from Hungry Jacks.  That was my lunch for the whole day.

It is kind of pathetic.

Getting Angry At Black Bags

Anyway, at work, everything was normal except that I got extremely enraged with missing my rhythm, and the repetitiveness of the task, as well as the line manager who just kept chastising me when I am working.

After a while he disappeared.  Then, I began missing my rhythm.  Then I started yelling and cussing to myself, not to anybody else.

I was just angry.

And at one point because the bags were black, I could not find the perforation in the black bags.

I yelled, “Who the fuck invented black,” out loud.

That is when the Fijian guy came back.  Then he stood behind me.  He is waiting for me to put a bag over the batts that had just come off the rollers.

I am thinking in my mind, “Yeah, you probably heard that, but I am not talking racist stuff about you being black.  I am talking about these black bags.  They should be white, so I can see what the fuck I am doing.”

The Problem With This Workplace

That is the problem with this workplace.

The first thing is that they do not care about people’s safety.  I injured my hands today.  They don’t give a fuck.

The guy is saying, “Work faster.  You should work faster.”

I want to say, “I work this pace because it is a safe pace for me.”

Then secondly, only this line manager treats people like farm dogs.  I don’t like it.

I have started to resent people who are younger than me telling me what to do.

“I have more experience than you buddy.  You think I have never been in a warehouse before?  Of course I can do what you are teaching me to do.  It is just you are asking me to go faster, and faster is not something you can teach.  I am trying to teach myself safety.”

“I don’t want to get myself fucking injured.  Are you going to go to the hospital and pay for all my bills?  No.  So shut the fuck up!”

Everyone At Work Gets Quiet Over My Angry Outbursts

In my mind, I knew I looked angry because the Samoan guy came over and helped me one time, and didn’t say anything.

Then the gay guy came over a few times and quietly helped me.  Then he just went quiet.

Even the line manager came over and helped me.  Only at the end of the day did he mention one recommendation.  He did not do it in a bossy way.

I knew that I looked pissed off.

Choosing Between Work And My Temper

But in my mind I am thinking, “Come on man.  What is more important?  This job, or your temper?”

The temper came out of nowhere, but if I lose this job because of my temper, that is not a good thing.

I will find another job that will be a bit easier, but right now I am thinking that I cannot let go of that money.  I need to at least work for 2 more weeks.  Then, I should be set.

Work Injuries And Insult Mounting Up

Today I finished work at 3:30 pm.  I was really angry for 6 hours of that day because I was so busy in my job, and it was just so frustrating.

I think the reason I developed rage in the late afternoon is because I would go through my routine, and then at the end of my routine, the machine would make a noise and it would interrupt my routine.  That would make me angry because I just want to finish my routine without interruptions.

Anyway, it was another boring day of me with no sleep, and another 2-3 injuries today.

This job is good at giving me injuries.

I already had an eye problem develop from this job with polyester flying into my eye.  I had a spine problem where it was hard to bend up and down.  I have had a loss of sleep from this job.  Then today, both of the bones in my palms started to feel sprains in them, because I kept twisting the black plastic bags.

And I feel like I have had a cold or flu now for at least one week.  The symptoms started when I had headaches, and I was taking Panadol for the last couple of days.  It changed to a runny nose.  Probably the flash migraine in my eye affects me.  And now it is kind of a runny nose.

Now, as I am walking back to Ingleburn station.  I am looking at cars in car yards again, $5,000 AUD for an automatic Mitsubishi.  Fuck man!

The Dreaded Call From My Recruitment Agency

As I suspected, I got a call from Programmed Integrated.  When I looked at the phone, I dreaded the news that they would give me.  I knew what they were going to say anyway.

I answered the phone, and a representative asked, “Hey, Tony.  Did you finish your work?”

I said, “Yeah.  I finished now.”

She said, “Okay.  Work called to tell me the role you were doing is no longer available.  So, don’t go in tomorrow!  But I have another job for you that starts tomorrow in Milperra.  Is that too far for you to go?”

I said, “No, definitely not.”

She continued, “It is at Pickles.  You have worked there before.”

I said, “I remember that.  That is a good place.”

Then she told me, “You have to have knowledge of an iPad to take photos.”

I said, “Yeah.  I have an IT background.  I can definitely do that.”

She said, “Okay, it starts tomorrow at 8 am.”

Then she put me in for that job.

That job with Pickles is obviously going to be much better than this job.

So, these guys in CSR Martini that offered me a job last week… full time my fucking ass!