Mad Chaos: Tuesday, September 10, 1996

Diary Of A Mad Chaos

Domestic Fight With Brother Over Eggs

From love, to dramatic, I come here today at this time to talk about what just happened to me.  I hope I don’t have to witness something like this again but I have a feeling that my temper and Eric’s put together will start it off again.

Eric and me got into an argument at 9:15 pm or so tonight.  Really it carries on from when he first started to argue with me.  I went upstairs to put away the food that I ate.  I had eggs and didn’t eat the yolks.  Before I threw them out, I asked my brother if he would like any, and he said yes.  So I put them on the table.

Confronted Over Food Waste

Then he went on as to how I wasted food.  He just started to piss me off, and I confronted him.

I asked him as to why he always makes trouble with the household.  He then fed me some bullshit how he, the drug smoking, mother bashing, house-breaking dumb motha fucker who hangs around druggo friends was better than me.

I don’t do any of the bad shit he does.  I don’t smoke, drink, pot, spit, break the house up, and have a nasty attitude like he does.

So he wanted to fight me.

Fight Brother In Backyard

We went out the back.  Then he started laying into me before I can even get ready the fucken dumb motha fucker.  Then I was ready and I started laying into him but none really got him.

Mum came out and made a big racket.  The neighbors came out and shit.  Then I settled her down because I don’t want to see the neighbors seeing this.

He started on me again.

He always wants to use his brute force on me, but I’m not scared of him anymore.

Brothers Fights Me In My Room

He then came into my room, and the cops were on the way because mum had called them.  Then he started hitting into me again because he was going to be cuffed up, and this time when he started hitting me I did block and was forced to my bed.

I got up and kicked him in the chest.  Then I had him on the defense and started laying into him.  I got him in the head and kicked him in the chest again.  He then laid into me once more but I was more aware and I blocked these shots.

I was just trying to think of what Imad had taught me and how to put that to use without hurting my brother and by defending myself.

I did get a couple of bruises to the head and a fat lip out of it, and my elbow is bruised from blocking.  I have to go to the gym tomorrow with these bruises.

Brother Is Taken To Police Station

He has now been taken down to the station.  He will be coming back tonight or tomorrow and he might try to come and get me, but I’m just gonna be blocking, and he’ll go away.

I can’t stress how I want to move out of this house and start living on my own or with friends.  I can’t wait to move out.

Motivated To Get Bigger

Before I move out, I have motivation to go to the gym and get big so next time he’ll think twice about trying to beat me up.  I know that my friends if they knew about this they would back me up, speaking of Imad and Jett.

Jett would back me up if he was here, but the thing is I think he would also get hurt.  If Imad was involved he wouldn’t get involved unless he saw me in real trouble or if I wanted him to.

Imad would have hammered my brother, and to say the truth, none of his blows hurt me.  I finally felt what it was like to get hit in the nose.  It bled for a bit but there wasn’t really that much pain and it stopped shortly after.

Dad Did Nothing To Stop The Fight

The thing I can’t believe is how my dad didn’t help me at all.  He just sat there on the couch and didn’t do a thing.  Then when I went up to him he said it was my fault and my heart just dropped to think that I started the whole thing.

I think that he is just too scared to confront my brother, but Eric will never hit my dad, and he knows that if he did hit him then he would be out of this house for a long time.

Gym Routine

Anyway since I’ve started in the this entry I might as well say that I had a workout at home for my forearms and my abs.  I done 6-8 sets for my forearms working it all, and I done 4 sets for my abdominals doing crunches in my room floor.

Planning Ahead

Tomorrow I have to go see my case manager.  I am also going to ring up Imad to see what he can do for me.  I am going to get into the topic of moving out with him one day and we’ll just cruise around.

I’m tired because of adrenaline going through my body, and I’m going to go to sleep soon.